Returning to the Land of the Living

I always have the same pattern when jumping back into the hustle:

Step 1: Clean my room as it has inevitably amassed a large pile of lazily discarded clothes and clutter in the days when I had little motivation for much other than rolling in and out of my bed in a stupor.  Somehow my head feels clearer when my room is back in order.

Step 2: Clean the kitchen.  Same as my room.  In this state, I don't feel like emptying the dishwasher.  I don't feel like cooking anything.  The counter next to the sink begins to parent a small population of abandoned cereal bowls.  For the sake of my sanity (and my roommate's), la cuisine must be in tip-top form.

Step 3:  Get caught back up on the breakdowns.  In the few days I'm mourning the loss of a role, I'll do what most normal people do when faced with a particularly difficult breakup... I avoid the glaring reminders of my lost love affair.  Once I've finally made it into the light at the end of the tunnel, I log back into my accounts and make sure I'm up to speed on what is being cast every day and get my submissions a-submitting.  Hollywood will keep clipping along with or without me and getting back in the game is the only way forward.

Step 4: Get my ass to the gym, on my yoga mat, and in my running shoes.  When you put me next to the average person, most would consider me a fairly fanatical health nut. But when I'm working my way through the five stages of grief, I wish it weren't so, but I am terrible at keeping up my fitness regime.  I haven't been to the yoga studio in about a week and a half.  And my diet?  I've been bad.  So very bad.  Over the course of a single day I actually had all four of the sublime ice cream sammys in the box from Trader Joe's. All. Four. In. One. Day.  (I admit this to you ONLY because I'm anonymous.  I would never cop to it in real life.)  As you already know, auditioning and pursuing this career is a huge mental game.  It is far easier to portray leading lady sexy in an audition when I actually feel leading lady sexy.  I don't feel leading lady sexy after wolfing down FOUR decadent desserts, delicious as they may be.  My feelings aside -- and again I wish it weren't so -- but there is also a definite inverse relationship between an increase in snugness of my size 4 pants and a decrease in job offers.  Can't have that.

Step 5: Business as usual.  I have a stack of post cards I need to send, and thank you notes for CD workshops.  I need to update my demo reel to include my television role, do some writing on my screenplay. There are networking opportunities to research and attend.  Anony Incorporated must return to full operation and it is up to the sole proprietor/product/shareholder -- me -- to get it there... and beyond....